Monday, oh Monday, where for art thou Monday? Why dost thou reign with great torment on thy captives, thy imprisoned victims of time? Why dost thy reputation of terror and mischief prove true upon the dawn of every week? What magic is this?
The magic is that it’s the beginning of the week, which means it’s the end of the weekend. Most people focus on the latter, which is why Mondays seem to be so frustrating. Sunday afternoons often consist of making the statement, “Tomorrow should be cancelled due to lack of interest.” Alas, the world doesn’t work that way.
I woke up this morning and found myself not wanting to get out of bed….again. This really can’t continue; I have to go out and live my life in a classroom; I have things I need to get done. These things include watching squirrels bury nuts and checking my empty mailbox…but they are still things!
But really, my To Do List is so long. It’s going to take some divine determination to get it all done.
World Literature flew by this morning. I honestly don’t even remember what we talked about. I don’t know where my brain was. Oh, right, it was stressing over the meeting I had scheduled with my Critical Thinking & Writing professor in the afternoon. Our final essay is due next Monday and we were to write a proposal for the essay and meet with her so she could edit it and let us know how we were doing in the class.
I was nervous because I wasn’t sure if I had written the proposal correctly. Also, my proposal was to compare St. Augustine’s Confessions and James Baldwin’s Go Tell it on the Mountain in light of intertextuality while using my own “religious beliefs” (that term always makes my relationship with God sound so cold and academic…it really bothers me) as a means of interpretation. Well, after she edited it, she told me that the point was to just compare the two works of literature and if I wanted to state an opinion I could do so briefly in the concluding paragraph. I imagined a canary getting shot out of the sky with a slingshot when she explained this to me. I understood her reasoning, but I still wish I could’ve been given the chance to make my argument.
I had planned on job-hunting (again) after meeting with my professor, but then I remembered I had a pile of homework the size of Mount Everest, flag included. So I grabbed a copy of the New York Times (which students get free on campus) and searched for the “jobs” section of the paper. Now, I’m not a city girl, a fact of which you may or may not be aware. Back in the sticks, if you were looking for a job, all you had to do was open up to the “jobs” section of the Evening Sun or the Daily Star and wham! instant access to working opportunities. The newspaper apparently doesn’t work that way here. Maybe the city’s too big; maybe I just didn’t look in the right spot. All I know is that I felt like an idiot for not knowing how to work a newspaper. I mean, come on.
I was in the cafeteria while reading the Times, and, when I went to take a sip of my cranberry juice, half of the bottle spilled down the front of my white sweater. My reaction was caught between muttering angry, unintelligible words and laughing in disbelief. I proceeded then to pick up my stuff and head back to my dorm. It just wasn’t my day.
Things weren’t much better in my dorm. I washed my sweater with soap and steaming hot water and thankfully all of the stains came out. But when I sat down to start writing my paper for Critical Thinking and Writing, I spent an entire twenty-five minutes just staring at the screen. I couldn’t figure out where to start. I tried outlining the paper, drawing a Venn diagram, etc., but I didn’t get anywhere for almost half an hour. I finally typed a solid paragraph…then it was time for dinner 🙂
On my way to the cafeteria I ran into a friend who asked if I wanted to eat with him. So I did, and we talked a lot about our majors, God, our relationships with Him, and writing. He’s a pretty cool person 🙂
The hours following the return to my desk in my room were pure agony and frustration. I was in the middle of writing something on the Internet and my connection suddenly evaporated and my document was half-saved. This happened three more times. Then, I received an email from my botany professor saying that I have a paper due tomorrow along with some reading, and I have to print out quite a few documents, news by which I felt totally blindsided. In the email she explained we were going to be discussing the validity of scientific arguments and experiments…which means I have more to do than I thought.
I’ve already spent part of the evening picturing myself banging my head against the wall, because this kind of crunch time doesn’t come up in my life very often, or at least it hasn’t in the last couple of months. I always get really freaked out about things when I’m in a spot like this. However, God has everything under control, just like He always does. Even if I do totally mess up all my assignments, forget to hand something in, fail a test, or make an invalid argument, God can still use me and He still loves me. God is not limited by the requirements the world has of me; the world cannot put God in a box.
So if I’m God’s child, His most precious possession, why should I let myself be put in a box by my own stress? God’s going to get me through this night, just like He’s gotten me through everything else. Homework and an all-nighter is nothing He can’t handle…and man am I glad this is true.
“Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!” –Psalm 46:10, ESV