I would like to say that God is good and that there’s no healing or encouraging like that of spending time with another Christian.
Charlene is staying over tonight and already I feel encouraged, even though we’re slaving through our homework.
The lesson of the day (as it has been every day) was to remember that my faith is not based off of my emotions, but rather based off of the truth of God’s word. Last night as I was trying to get to sleep and this morning as I was trying to wake up, my emotions were seriously weighing me down.
I just don’t feel God today. I just don’t feel like I’m doing anything. I just don’t feel like….
And on and on.
But then I remembered that the heart is deceitful, and that my emotions are pros at getting me down. So I opened my Bible and read truth, and while fighting off my emotions is a hard thing to do, it’s so worth it. The thing about emotions is, especially for women, they’re eloquent and persuasive and totally overwhelming at times. This morning, however, I read Proverbs 1:10: “My son, if sinners entice you, do not consent” (ESV). This reminded me that I have a choice, whether it’s with people trying to get me to do something I’m not comfortable with or it’s Satan tempting me to fear and worry or it’s my own flesh that’s pulling me down. Nothing is ever too overwhelming, not for God, not for truth. God has given me a spirit of love, courage, and self-control, and a choice…God always gives me a choice. He gave me a choice between eternity with Him or eternity separated from Him. He gave me a choice between going to Pratt or going to Colorado. While one chosen path is His path for me, He leaves me to decide. When it comes to temptation and enticement, I don’t have to play the game, but I do have to fight the battle. These are my choices: I can play emotional hide and seek, or I can pull out the Sword of the Spirit and fight my emotions away until God’s truth is all I can see. I don’t have to consent. I’m a warrior of God’s spiritual army, and I am equipped to fight this battle.
Word, Usage, and Style went well. I spent lunch reading The Grace of God and eating sushi. It was at this point in time that I realized I have a serious problem: I am addicted to sushi. And churros…because churros are amazing….but especially sushi.
Studio went…alright. For some reason, I feel very comfortable but very weird in that environment. I really appreciate my professor…except at one point today. He compared Fur Elise by Beethoven to a song by Britney Spears. No…no, don’t do that.
Anyway, we learned about conflict and the difference between different point of views from which we can write. The prompts he gives are very challenging and never what I expect them to be, which is refreshing. Unfortunately, during class, I realized I did last week’s assigned homework completely wrong, and I felt like an idiot. But he told me I could re-write it and send it to him. Thank goodness for second chances.
I completed as much homework as I could before getting ready to go to Zumba. The workout was good, but I’m not sure if I’ll go back. While it is indeed a good workout, I refused to do half of the moves because of how sexual and immodest they were. Now, I’m not one to bash dancing, I personally love to dance even though I’m not very good at it, but there’s a line. That line was jumped over very willingly, which is a bummer, because I like Zumba.
I noticed, from things that have happened in the past couple of days, how pressured women, especially girls my age, are to be provocative in their movements and in their motivations. I’m sure some people would challenge me on this but I seriously think, despite how unnaturally competitive and fighter-like some feminists want to appear and push other women to be, the desire is still to appear desirable. I never really felt that pressure until I came here, where everyone looks fabulous in their own way. But the thing is, this pressure is selfish, and is the opposite of how God wants women to present themselves. Modesty is a big deal. I didn’t know how much modesty affected my brothers in Christ for a long time, and when I found out, I was really embarrassed. So, ladies, think about your brothers in Christ when you’re deciding what to wear and how to act around them; don’t expect them to exercise self-control if you’re not making it easier for them by treating yourself and them with respect.
Well, I seriously doubt I’ll be getting much sleep tonight, but I shall prevail, nonetheless. God has really blessed me with Charlene. He’s really taken care of me, with everything, from my church family to my classes, and from my schedule to my finances. He just loves me…and I know I haven’t done anything to merit it, but He loves me.
Oh how He loves me…
“But now thus says the Lord, he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: “Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine.” —Isaiah 43:1, ESV