This morning the only thing I could taste was tea. I brushed my teeth and chewed mint gum and had breakfast but nothing worked: all I could taste was tea. It was actually kind funny. As I was talking to God, I was saying, “God, I drank waaay too much tea last night,” and then I started laughing at myself. The general stereotype is when kids go to college they drink way too much and party way too often. I can only imagine:
Steve: “Man, I drank way too much last night.”
Jason: “Yeah, I mean, I had like four cups of tea and I’m feeling it this morning.”
🙂 I just felt silly 🙂
I was reminded that God knows more about me than I know about myself. As I was doing my Bible Study, I was writing about generational bondage and sin. I love my parents. They’re some of the strongest, most level-headed, wisest, and funniest people I know, and I promise I’m not just saying that because they brought me into this world. My parents are amazing 🙂 But they are human.
Anyway, this morning as I was writing about one particular generational bondage that I thought was the only one, I suddenly realized there was something else I had totally missed. I had always thought it was just part of my personality, but as I traced it back through my family, I realized it was something completely different. The best apart about realizing what’s generational sin/bondage and what’s just genuine heredity is that you learn how you’re actually supposed to be. Okay, that sounded weird. What I mean is, God can stop it in you before you carry it into another generation.
For example: there might be a family who’s male line is particularly unforgiving, and the unforgiveness grows with each generation. A father exhibits unforgiveness and his son sees this example and becomes unforgiving, and then his son and his son after him exhibit the same problem. But of course then you have people like Hezekiah who follow God and exhibit none of the traits of his father before him, even though his Dad was a total nut job and sacrificed Hezekiah’s brothers and worshiped idols and trashed the temple. But yeah. It was neat 🙂
After I talked to God about things and finished my Bible Study, I took a shower and headed to Target to get some things. I had to buy some wedding anniversary cards for some people in my church back in The Sticks. As I scoured the card options, I almost dropped my purse when I saw card labels saying “two men in love” and “two women in love.” I just didn’t even realize they had cards like that. I was shocked and chills went all up and down my body. The chills weren’t from homophobia, or any other tag you’d like to place on someone who thinks homosexuality is flat-out wrong, but rather they were from an understanding: Matthew 24:36,37 says “But concerning that day (the Second Coming of Christ) and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, nor the Son, but the Father only. For as were the days of Noah, so will be the coming of the Son of Man.”
Flipping back to Genesis, the earth was described as “corrupt” and “filled with violence” during the days of Noah (6:11,12). So, if the days before the Rapture are going to be like the days before God FLOODED THE EARTH, it makes me wonder just how bad it was way back then when the earth was young and had that new-earth smell. It also makes me wonder how bad it’s going to get here, or how much worse it could possibly be. But I can imagine much worse…I just wouldn’t know how to fight against it. But God knows how to fight…I’m just still in basic training 🙂
I left Target and on the way to my dorm I stopped at Bagel World. I got hot chocolate and a cinnamon raisin bagel with cream cheese, and it was the biggest blessing ever, not only because the food was good and the price was right, but because the lid of my hot chocolate broke so I had to walk very slow to keep it from spilling, which gave me time to kind of look around, take my time, talk to God as I walked, and enjoy the walk instead of rushing through it. It’s amazing how things that might be a hindrance can become something that makes your day 🙂
Back at my dorm, I ate my bagel and hung out until Karly popped in! That’s right, Karly was visiting The City and she came in and we had a good talk. It was really nice to see her 🙂
Later on in the day, after I got in an hour of studying, reading, and errand running, Rebecca and I went to Waza. I just want to say how absolutely cool I felt being able to bring someone to a place they’d never been to before in The City. I don’t know why I felt cool, but I did 🙂 Anyway, I ordered a Godzilla roll and she ordered ramen. We had tea (yes, MORE TEA) and dessert and talked about everything.
After I walked with Rebecca back to the subway, I trekked back through the wind to my dorm and began studying some more. Then I began writing a short story, which is due in a week. My Studio professor told me to write something new this time, and then our second piece could be the first chapter of my novel, which I didn’t mind because I kind of wanted to write something new anyway. But then, when I sat down at my computer to write, I had no idea what to put down.
I listened to music for a while, staring up at the ceiling and hoping that an idea would fly in through the window and hit me square in the face (it didn’t happen). So I decided to just start writing. An hour or two later I was sketching characters, creating their backgrounds and delving into worlds unknown. It’s amazing what happens when I just write 🙂 sometimes I feel like I think about it too much…hm.
At one point I got an email from the editor of the Prattler. She’s a really nice person, but her email seemed a little harsh. Apparently I had missed some of her edits and she wasn’t happy about it. But before I could freak out, I thought about what she might be doing at that point: a lot of people probably hadn’t done what she’d asked, she was probably tired, and her final year of college had probably come on like a tidal wave. I asked her which ones I’d missed specifically, because I’d thought I completed them all, and I apologized. We had a good conversation and she sent me the final edit of my article: it was nothing like the original.
Now, the general spirit of the article was definitely there, and the interviews I’d used were also still there, but it was very different. She had conducted a separate online survey that came out with 79% of Pratt students believing in evolution, 9% believing in Creation, and 12% believing in some mixture of the two. At first I wanted to feel discouraged, like I had been defeated, but when I sat back and thought about it, these were just the facts. It’s true that a lot of people on campus believe in evolution. It’s true that not many people take the Bible seriously or even believe in my God. It’s true that few people believe in Creation. But should the facts discourage me? Hardly.
God isn’t limited by “the facts.” The fact was that Abraham and Sarah were too old to have children. The fact was that Moses had killed a man and had a stutter. The fact was that Elijah’s head was worth tons of money to Jezebel. The fact was that Jesus died…but God is just too big to put in a box 🙂
Reading the article and talking to the editor gave me a good opportunity to talk my reaction through with God, to figure out where to go from there. Truth is there was nowhere to go, at least not yet. I knew where a lot of people were in at least one area of their beliefs, which was kind of exciting to me 😀 I prayed for the editor, I prayed for all of the members of the Prattler, I prayed for Pratt.
Tomorrow will consist of studying…and studying….and writing…and reading….and, yep, studying. But it’s okay, because it’s just this last week of plowing through long nights and towers of books and then it’s a week of seeing friends and family and trying to calm my brain. I’m so grateful for breaks.
Isn’t it cool how God proves Himself able through situations in which we’d normally freak out? I love seeing Him prove me wrong, especially when it comes to my reactions. He’s just so skilled in (every area, I know) the area of stabilizing, the area of loving, the area of guiding and teaching and helping. He’s also impossibly patient, which is a good thing because I can be terribly stubborn sometimes. But yeah, He’s amazing 🙂
“For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God.” —Romans 8:20,21, ESV