This morning’s Bible study was about God’s daily rule, and it was just what I needed.
I have experienced many times when my devotional or a verse in my Facebook newsfeed or my Bible study gives me the word I need the most, or the word that I’ll need the most throughout the day. This morning was no exception, but rather a refreshing familiarity.
“O Lord be gracious to us; we long for you. Be our strength every morning, our salvation in time of distress.” (Isaiah 33:2)
This verse from Isaiah was one I’d never seen before. I’m seeing a lot of things in the Bible that I had no idea existed within the pages of my Savior’s love letter to me, and each new thing I learn makes me excited about how many other things I don’t know, how many other things there are for me to learn. 😀
Remembering that God rules not only over my vanquished past and my distant future, but He also rules over my immediate present. Every hour God is in control and He is ruling. It’s funny, when Beth Moore said, “suddenly I realized God’s blessing would only come when I did what He said. I have learned that I can only trust my heart when it’s fully surrendered to obey God’s truth,” something inside me stirred. The rebellious part of me was all like, “well, that’s stupid. I’m not going to follow someone just because they’ll give me nice things,” and the sane, obedient part of me was all like, “you’re a doofus; look at every benefit you’ve gained from obeying God, and it’s not for His good, but rather for yours.”
The reason why walking with God and obeying His leading is so important is because God knows what’s going to happen, who’s going to be involved, how it’s all going to work, and He knows what to do. We can’t see the future, and while God knows His plans and has prosperous plans in mind for us, we don’t have the capacity to even wishfully think we could have plans for God. Ergo, God is the leader, and if He’s your co-pilot, you just might want to switch seats. I know I’m a terrible pilot.
My biggest temptation when I don’t feel that God is illuminating my way clearly, when I feel like His leading just isn’t clear enough, is to take the liberty to follow my feelings (follow my heart) and do what makes me happy instead of what I know His word says and what I know He would want me to do. Even if you’re not sure where God wants you to go, His word is clear as to what to do while you’re waiting.
World Literature went by along with Critical Thinking & Writing, but I couldn’t focus or get a hold on what we were discussing. Ever since I actually got really excited about being single, people have been asking me why I’m not dating anyone and encouraging me to go with my feelings if I like someone, my friends are getting into relationships left and right, and my music is going haywire with love songs on shuffle. What in the world?
I seriously never thought this would be a problem, but I appreciate the opportunity to practice following God even when the people around, as well-meaning as they may be, are subtly contradicting Him. This might sound weird but I’m actually getting a thrill out of obeying Him despite all of it 🙂
Also, my mind at the moment is so story-oriented that everything that happens during the day goes through a fictional filter in my head and comes out as a story on the other side. Sometimes it’s fun. Other times it’s frustrating and distracting.
We were given our final assignment for Critical Thinking & Writing, which is a research paper. This is stacked on top of the World Literature term paper, which I’ve begun to fight but I’m already weary. But I have to trust that when I ask for focus, determination, and endurance, God will enhance these fruits and push me forward, so that even through small things like homework, He’ll be glorified.
It’s just a matter of making my other thoughts quiet down and stop being so atrociously loud.
After Critical Thinking & Writing, I went to my dorm only to realize I had left my keys inside the dorm. In the morning it had been cold and rainy so I’d worn my peacoat, but as the day went on, the sun came out and it warmed up quickly, so I changed into a sweatshirt instead. I had left my keys in the peacoat.
So I went and sat in the lounge, skyping my mom and listening to the birds singing outside. It’s odd: while I was talking to my mom, there were large amounts of snow in the background. I couldn’t help but feel a little spoiled 🙂
Once I got back into my dorm, I packed my bag and hopped on the G to go to 7th Ave to study with Edward at the Cocoa Bar, a small cafe for writers. It’s become a normal thing, studying with Edward at the cafe, and oddly enough I’ve been getting more work done studying with him than I have in my dorm.
We met and went to the cafe, found a table and sprawled out our books. While editing, writing, drinking tea, and reading, we talked about the Sanhedrin (a Jewish power in the Roman Empire, the same power that crucified Jesus), about art, about books, about history. We got into a debate or two about random topics. I had a good time and got a lot done.
My mind and heart are very busy right now, buzzing with activity and questions and reactions. But even though this is so, I’m still able to see past it, to look beyond all of the things that confuse me, and remember God’s instruction for my life, His love for me, and how even when everything else can be called into question and trust is an expensive jewel, God’s love and His word remains.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”