In Tenderness

There’s a short story written by Max Lucado titled “The Wemmick Story,” which Hannah recommended to me a couple of nights ago. And call me corny, but when I read it I cried. It just reminded me of how simple God intended things to be, how He requires child-like faith from me, and how I’ve complicated just about everything.

*Sigh*

This morning God gave me the energy to wake up early to spend time with Him, helping me to be disciplined. He helped me not focus on the time, and I was able to focus on Him, not without much warfare and perseverance. But when I finished, two and a half hours later, I knew I’d been victorious, and that God was responsible for such a victory. The battle is in the small things.

I talked to Him about the small things, about the big things, and about the things in between. I talked to Him about baking and about short stories, about my professors and my classmates. I prayed over something horrible that happened on campus last night.

It was pouring rain, blustery, as Winnie the Pooh would say, my favorite fall weather 🙂 I got changed and ate breakfast and then went to World Civ. Three hours later, I stepped out of class with a mid-term paper to write. Right. Mid-terms.

In a weird way I really enjoy writing term papers. I love the research and organizing all of it and just discussing evidence in a concrete way. I love seeing the paper clean and crisp and stapled together, the result of weeks of work and oodles of spent time and brain power. It’s fun for me 😀

Just remind me of that in the middle of next week when I’m pulling my hair out trying to talk about the development of cinnamon throughout maritime world history.

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I grabbed a sandwich for lunch and headed back to my dorm. I sat down for a while, revising a short story to turn in next week. I decided to revise the one that everyone thought was written solely to make a political statement about abortion. I’m not sure why I chose that one…maybe because I know that sometimes, when things go bad in life, and people hit rock bottom, God comes through and takes them from the depths of despair into which they’ve fallen and brings them to a place that, yeah, kind of feels like a fairytale. It’s odd how people don’t think other people work that way, that life doesn’t work that way, that it’s not realistic for things like that to happen.

Whenever someone tells me this, I chuckle and shake my head. I wonder what they’d say if they could go back in time and see me when I was fourteen, addicted to a boy, consumed by depression and thoughts of suicide, and then come back and talk to me now. I wonder what they’d say if they could talk to Mary Magdalene, who’d carried seven demons around with her before Christ rescued her from them and reconciled her unto Himself. I wonder what they’d say if they could talk to someone like Beth Moore, or even half of the counselors that I worked with this past summer.

There was a quote I saw the other day, saying “Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future.” I think people sometimes think Christians have always had great lives full of sunshine and rainbows. Little do they know Christians are just on the right side of an invisible war, fighting every day to be stronger, better, greater, kinder, gentler, more loving, more tender, more patient, all for the sake of our Commander, who loves us. They don’t remember that Christians are human too.

Hm.

I headed to Studio after grabbing a cup of coffee (today was my coffee day, hehe). Today, at the end of class, my professor gave us the opportunity to have a conversation about process, content, style, etc. So I asked all of my questions and we had a great discussion. At one point, however, he explained to us, as he had many times before, that we’re gods in the way we create things out of nothing.

While I know (or I hope) he doesn’t mean we’re actual gods, the expression isn’t at all accurate, mostly because, when it comes right down to it, God is the one who gives us the imagination, the one who’s gifted us with the creativity, the one who’s characterized us with the talent and presented the world and all of it’s stories, written long before our time. He’s the one who’s written the greatest story of all time, the first story, which is the beginning of the world and the universe and mankind and everything we know to be real and true and solid in life. We’re an image of Him and, because we’re sinful, only reflect Him partially, able to create something out of something else, but never something out of nothing. I can’t pull a chicken out of the air any more than I can bring about a character or a plot line or a landscape that hasn’t existed before or that wasn’t brought to mind because of the imagination and talent God has given me.

The discussion, regardless, was fruitful and I learned a lot and the discussion of the process of writing and what our goals should be as writers was helpful. After class, I grabbed some chocolate cake and headed back to the dorm to continue working on my story until it was time for German class. And then the day, post-German, was over.

During German, we talked about foods, and I nearly burst out in song when we talked about “Schnitzel with noodles” and “crisp apple Strudel” 🙂 I think my professor almost did as well.

Tomorrow I head to the internship for the day, and then spend the rest of the weekend working on homework, doing a small amount of shopping for ingredients, because I’m spending the afternoon baking with Jenny come Sunday 🙂 I’m going to be baking pumpkin chocolate chip cookies, and maybe fudge brownies, but I’m not sure yet. Anyhow, it’ll be nice to bake.

God is kind of amazing, you know? The small things, like baking with Jenny, are so big, and He allows them into my life, especially during the times that are the hardest. Today, while I was sitting in Studio, I was reminded of how awesome it was that I could be at an art school to learn about the ins and outs and ups and downs and whatnots of writing and write and read and everything else every day. It’s kind of awesome 🙂 Difficult, no doubt, but an adventure, much bigger than I ever could’ve imagined it.

“Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels, nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

—Romans 8:37-39, NKJV

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About newminority16

Hi, my name is Hunter. I very often make random comments about bacon and how chocolate is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy :) So, before I started this blog, I was getting ready to make one of the biggest decisions of my life: college. God led me to go to a secular college in New York City, a place I was deathly afraid of. It's followed me through those years at college straight into married life and becoming a military spouse, all while seeking to following Christ and know God better and share Him with others. This blog is a way for you to go with me through these adventures, through being a Christian in a world that's forgotten its Creator.
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One Response to In Tenderness

  1. Loved your paragraph about Christians and how people think our lives are rainbows and butterflies…the battle is real and warfare is real. Amen

    Also–I feel like that little bunny most days when I’m writing a grad paper!! BETTER yet, wish I could snuggle with a bunny LOL

    Like

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